Resentment or contentment?

January 2015

I stopped.

I felt better and I stopped writing.

Suddenly, over 4 months went by.

Where did it go.

Was it used wisely? And yes I found that it was.

I found me, I found my soul, and I found my heart again.

Such a relief. I felt rebellion, I felt resentment, I felt contentment.

I learnt to stop again. I learnt to breathe, I learnt to meditate and be present. I started to love my job again, I started to love me, I started to stop and I learnt how to enjoy life.

The most wonderful thing in this experience it the joy I got from my home. The joy I got from my children and the joy I got from achievement.

And the big relief was the depression and anxiety was held at bay. I felt wonderful, I feel wonderful. What a joy. What a wonderful wonderful joy.

I felt love. I was able to receive it and enjoy it.

6 months later  ~ from that day when I made a decision to do what was right for me, life has just grown. Oh and so have I (in more ways than one)

I have felt myself mature, I have watched my body crave healthier food, I have put on weight, ok maybe that can stop now - 6kg later and still increasing.

They say anxiety and depression is the silent killer. It is very secretive. It chews away at your brain, soul  and your body. It makes you a jittery mess. It brings you to your knees. But it can also be a gift. Because when you are free of it, life is glorious.

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